I Was Born Free

"We're all one thing, Lieutenant. That's what I've come to realize. Like cells in a body. 'Cept we can't see the body. The way fish can't see the ocean. And so we envy each other. Hurt each other. Hate each other. How silly is that? A heart cell hating a lung cell." - Cassie from THE THREE
Posts tagged "Oscars"

Just uploaded my Oscars vlog!

If Sacha Baron Cohen gets to walk the red carpet as “The Dictator”, Julianne Moore should be forced to walk the red carpet as Sarah Palin.

If Sacha Baron Cohen gets to walk the red carpet as “The Dictator”, Julianne Moore should be forced to walk the red carpet as Sarah Palin.

It’s pointless for me to try to do one of those “will win/should win” things, since the Oscar nominations are so bizarrely bad this year. There are only like 3 people nominated that I want to win.

So why not do a pointless post where I let my ego and personal preferences go wild and make new nominations and new winners, based only on the movies I’ve seen? The winners are bolded, if you’re a little thick. 

Best Picture

  • Beginners
  • The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
  • Martha Marcy May Marlene
  • Melancholia
  • A Separation
  • Shame
  • Take Shelter

Best Actress

  • Sareh Bayat - A Separation
  • Kirsten Dunst - Melancholia
  • Adepero Oduye - Pariah
  • Elizabeth Olsen - Martha Marcy May Marlene
  • Tilda Swinton - We Need to Talk About Kevin

Best Actor

  • Michael Fassbender - Shame
  • Peyman Maadi - A Separation
  • Ewan McGregor - Beginners
  • Gary Oldman - Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
  • Michael Shannon - Take Shelter

Best Supporting Actress

  • Kathy Baker - Take Shelter
  • Jessica Chastain - Take Shelter
  • Sarina Farhadi - A Separation
  • Carey Mulligan - Shame
  • Sarah Paulson - Martha Marcy May Marlene

Best Supporting Actor

  • Tom Hardy - Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
  • John Hawkes - Martha Marcy May Marlene
  • Shahab Hosseini - A Separation
  • Christopher Plummer - Beginners
  • Kiefer Sutherland - Melancholia

Best Original Screenplay

  • Beginners
  • Melancholia
  • A Separation
  • Shame
  • Take Shelter

Best Adapted Screenplay

  • The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
  • The Skin I Live In
  • Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
  • (I ran out of movies and refuse to throw in The Help)

Best Director

  • Asghar Farhadi - A Separation
  • Terrence Malick - The Tree of Life
  • Steve McQueen - Shame
  • Jeff Nichols - Take Shelter
  • Lars von Trier - Melancholia
Happier times.

Happier times.

Best Actor.

Nothing like getting in on a day-old meme with something only I will find funny!
Are people still saying “winning”?

Nothing like getting in on a day-old meme with something only I will find funny!

Are people still saying “winning”?

No matter how bad the news is, this video will always cheer me up. (with the exception of Maggie’s face)

Never forget.

Never forget.

Sorry guys, this is the only celebrity trainwreck I have time for this week.

Sorry guys, this is the only celebrity trainwreck I have time for this week.

As the evening wore on, Franco’s thoughts became more jumbled and self-flagellating:

Maybe hosting a show isn’t as easy as I thought it was going to be.

Maybe I can’t do it while Tweeting and taking photos and making videos backstage. Maybe I should have focused on the actual hosting part a little more. Or at all.

I suck at this. Why did I agree to do it? Oh my God — look at me there on the monitor — Anne is doing that lovable manic thing, pouring it on five times harder than she needs to. Why? It’s because I’m standing right next to Anne and I’m barely doing anything, and she’s overcompensating.

I am practically dead onscreen.

Look at me! Kids’ action figures are more expressive. I should at least smile!

At which point Franco would will himself to smile, and it would come out a wince.

What a shitty year for movies!  And for life, really!  But that hasn’t stopped me from taking a moment to entertain the vapidness of the Academy Awards.  Below are my predictions for the major categories.  The bolded nominees are what I think will win, and the italicized nominees are what I think should win.

Adapted Screenplay
127 Hours (Simon Beaufoy and Danny Boyle)
The Social Network (Aaron Sorkin)
Toy Story 3 (Michael Arndt, story by John Lasseter, Andrew Stanton and Lee Unkrich)
True Grit (Joel Coen and Ethan Coen)
Winter’s Bone (Debra Granik and Anne Rossellini)

Comment: I am pretty sure I will go to my grave not understanding what is so goddamn great about The Social Network.  I haven’t seen Toy Story 3, but I know I’d prefer any of the other nominees to take this one.

Original Screenplay
Another Year (Mike Leigh)
The Fighter (Paul Attanasio, Lewis Colich, Eric Johnson, Scott Silverand Paul Tamasy)
Inception (Christopher Nolan)
The Kids are All Right (Stuart Blumberg and Lisa Cholodenko)
The King’s Speech (David Seidler)

Comment: I haven’t actually seen Another Year, but I am pretty sure it is better than the rest of these nominees.  I find it downright shocking that Inception snuck into this category.  

Achievement in Directing
Darren Aronofsky (Black Swan)
David O. Russell (The Fighter)
Tom Hooper (The King’s Speech)
David Fincher (The Social Network)
Joel and Ethan Coen (True Grit)

Comment: I could be wrong on this one, but I think Hooper will sneak in.  He pulled off an upset at the DGAs which is a very good indicator of who will win.  If it’s Fincher, so be it.  As long as David O. Russell doesn’t get it.

Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role
Amy Adams (The Fighter)
Helena Bonham Carter (The King’s Speech)
Melissa Leo (The Fighter)
Hailee Steinfeld (True Grit)
Jacki Weaver (Animal Kingdom)

Comment: I really hope this is what happens!  I thought The Fighter was a very very bad film, and I thought Melissa Leo was downright terrible in it.  Hopefully her bizarrely tacky, self-financed campaign really did ruin her chances as some people are claiming.  Plus, pretty much everyone loves Hailee Steinfeld.  I have not seen Animal Kingdom, unfortunately.  I have a sneaking suspicion that Jacki Weaver’s name would be italicized if I had.  I must say, I don’t think I’ve ever been rooting against someone for the Oscar harder than I’m rooting against Melissa Leo.  And I started a facebook group called Stop Sandy! last year.

Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role
Christian Bale (The Fighter)
John Hawkes (Winter’s Bone)
Jeremy Renner (The Town)
Mark Ruffalo (The Kids are All Right)
Geoffrey Rush (The King’s Speech)

Comment: Boy oh boy did I hate Christian Bale in The Fighter.  It pains me that his win seems unstoppable.  At least Wahlberg didn’t even get nominated.  But yeah, give it to ANY of these guys (haven’t seen The Town, full disclosure) instead of him, world where justice exists.  And just look at John Hawkes!  He’s been around forever, and he was great!

Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role
Javier Bardem (Biutiful)
Jesse Eisenberg (The Social Network)
Colin Firth (The King’s Speech)
James Franco (127 Hours)
Jeff Bridges (True Grit)

Comment: I’ll go ahead and go with the flow and say that Firth should win.  This does kind of remind me of Forest Whitaker and Helen Mirren’s wins in 2007, where no one could really argue that either of them was undeserving, but there was still more interesting stuff out there.  Aside from Jesse Eisenberg, I think you could make a case that any of the other nominees deserve it over Firth.  And really, if Gosling had gotten a nomination, I couldn’t italicize his name hard enough.

Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role
Annette Bening (The Kids are All Right)
Nicole Kidman (Rabbit Hole)
Jennifer Lawrence (Winter’s Bone)
Natalie Portman (Black Swan)
Michelle Williams (Blue Valentine)

Comment: Oh, NatPort.  Few things really make my blood boil more than the Academy Award for Best Actress.  From Gwyneth Paltrow to Sandra Bullock, the Academy loves to get this one wrong.  This year, however, I am just numb to it.  My two favorite performances in this category (Jennifer Lawrence and Michelle Williams) have 0.00 chance, and my two least favorites (Natalie Portman and Annette Bening) are the frontrunner and dark horse.  Whatever, Academy.  Maybe you guys can find a way to give it to Jennifer Aniston next year.

Best Motion Picture of the Year
Black Swan
The Fighter
The Kids are All Right
The King’s Speech
The Social Network
127 Hours
Toy Story 3
True Grit
Winter’s Bone

Comment: I have seen nine of these movies!  The only one I missed was Toy Story 3.  Has there ever been a more lackluster group of ten movies that are supposedly the best movies of an entire year?  I don’t think so!  I could go through and list the faults in all of them, but really, who cares at this point?  If The King’s Speech really does pull it off and beat The Social Network, then I will be happy.  But the same kind of happy I was when The Hurt Locker pulled it off and beat Avatar.  There were definitely other movies nominated that I liked a lot more (A Serious Man, Precious, Inglourious Basterds).  I think Winter’s Bone and True Grit (and maybe even 127 Hours) are the best movies in this category.  The rest kind of falls into that “meh” category.  Except The Fighter, which I think is a downright terrible movie.  I think we all should collectively take a big smoke break for this category out of protest.

OK, back to Libya, Wisconsin and Planned Parenthood, everyone!

As she read the major nominees, it must have occurred to last year’s Oscar winner Mo’Nique that this was a rare year in modern times when no African-American was nominated.